By Renee Pullman

Do you remember that old Neil Diamond/Barbara Streisand love song, “You Don’t Send Me Flowers Anymore?” It is all about a love relationship that wasn’t maintained. It is a common pattern with couples and so their love ebbs and flows until one day, it is just gone. The relationship at this point can probably be resurrected unless someone else enters the picture and picks up you or your partner.

It is an old story, you are with someone for a long time and the passion has gone. Has your love grown cold? Is passion and sex gone from your relationship? While not an unusual condition it holds danger for the relationship, it also takes away happiness and meaning from the individuals in the relationship.

The intensity of love in any relationship increases and decreases and couples must realize that this is a natural condition. Danger comes when the relationship is in a down cycle and perhaps another person comes into the picture and attracts the eye of one of the partners. Temptation at the wrong time can easily lead to an affair and a break up.

The new person introduces danger and fun that turns on the endorphin tap in the brain. Brain chemicals overtake our about to stray partner and the relationship is toast. It doesn’t have to be that way.

Just like your car will break down if you don’t maintain it, so too your relationship – the two of you need to be taking care of each other. Spend time with each other, go back and do the things that you did when you met, things that were fun and that brought you together. Is it dressing up and going out, camping, fishing, sports, dancing? Whatever those things are find a way to do them on a regular basis.

How about a surprise, a gift, or a card? These sound a little mundane but as the toll of everyday life bares in those kinds of gestures can have a meaning and an effect beyond what might seem rational. The thing is you want to keep them regular and random at the same time. Sending flowers on a certain day every week will lose its effects – but if you do it randomly enough to keep the surprise element in then they will work every time.

Often during the ebb times sex disappears. Sex is another key part to maintaining a relationship. Sexless marriages are common today and it is tragic, you and your partner could give each other so much joy through sex. Is your partner not initiating or refusing sex with you, or is it you who has put on the damper? This is something that needs attention: discuss it in an understanding and loving manor, address any physical issues with your doctor, get counseling if you need to but get this important element back into your relationship.

Dealing with relationship problems is something we all must deal with at sometime or another. Discover the secrets of relationships by clicking the link or just go directly to http://www.TheMagicOfMakingUpFast.com and get your free relationship report.

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By Renee Pullman

Many couples are able to work out most of the details of their divorce on their own and even though they may have lawyers they will save a lot of money because of it. Here is the rub: maybe you have this thing worked out between you and you are getting a budget divorce. Your attorney may not be paying as much attention as you would hope. A divorce “surprise’ might enter in to the picture. Consider this story which was inspired by real events:

Les And His Big Divorce Surprise

Teresa and Les signed their dissolution agreement and went on their separate ways. Teresa did very well with a nice maintenance agreement and Les quit claimed the house to her.

Two years go by and some months ago Les made his last payment to Teresa. He is now a free man. Les had married Marsha along the way and at last they can move from the apartment they were living in and into a house.

They found a nice place which is now within their budget and they made an offer to buy and had their offer accepted.

Now its Halloween 2009: Les answers the phone and the mortgage broker asks Les why he did not report his other mortgage and why it is in arrears.

Teresa had not been so good on the payments since her maintenance checks from Les had ended and now the old marital house is about to go into foreclosure.

Les had quit claimed the house to her and he thought he was done with it, surprise! Although Les had given up his interest in the house, he failed to realize that he could not give up his interest in the mortgage, the bank was not party to the divorce settlement and still holds him liable for the mortgage.

Not only had Les made a poor settlement with Teresa but now he has to pay again. No new home for Les and his new wife, and his Ex has screwed him once again.

What Other Surprises May Lurk In My Divorce?

There are many surprises and traps possible in any legal proceeding – like Les’s surprise or like thinking that you are getting a tax write off for the kids but failing to realize that if the agreement is not done right you may just have primed up yourself for yet another divorce surprise. The list goes on, you really do need to learn the processes of divorce if you expect to get the best settlement and win your divorce.

You can take the surprises out; you can understand the process and where the potential problems are. This way you will work better with your attorney and avoid the divorce surprises and traps that are out there.

Avoid Divorce Surprises

Divorce for men means learning all of the tactics and strategies that will give you the insider information to avoid surprises and come out of divorce court without losing everything. Learn what it takes to win your divorce.

http://www.Squidoo.com/DivorceForMen is all about divorce for men – tactics, strategy, and how to keep your money, your kids, and your stuff.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Renee_Pullman
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Chapter 11 – Effects of Divorce on Health

Trying desperately to move on… | Divorce and Separation

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Divorce: What About The Kids?

To my surprise, he tells me that he knows what I am talking about. He describes to me that he feels like a piece of fruit that used to have a mushy interior, but now he is filled with fibrous connections.

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